Are you tired of this modern world?

I deleted Facebook last night. I had music playing in bed we both loved, until hubby started watching video snippets in his news feed. I turned my music up so he put his headphones on.

Husband beside me, turned away watching video’s while I drifted and remembered days where we would hold hands and whisper into the night.

I deleted the app, felt immediately lightened by relief and danced to the toilet. Then slept like a log. To be fair husband gave me the best cuddles as the fan droned and the night swam.

This morning I slept in. I reached for my phone and turn the alarm off. Stretching gleefully I had no notifications to check. No scrolling that’s supposed to last a minute as an hour creeps by.

I went and picked up something from a craft shop. Sat and finished The Haunting of Hill House while I cross stitched a Christmas present. Then I sewed my dress for a friend’s wedding tomorrow, worked through a pile of hemming.

Returned to the couch and finished an assignment for Uni, then made pork schnitzels for family dinner.

I am not a productive person. As an introvert I need to recuperate on my days at home. Mostly I crochet, read and nap to true crime podcasts. The most surprising thing when I quit smoking was all the extra time I had. Without Facebook I had more than an extra hour or so, I had a whole day. I didn’t even miss the meme’s.

To be perfectly transparent I kept Messenger. I have very important people I chat with daily in there. I have a Uni chat where we mull over essays and keep each other up to date. International friends who are so dear to my heart I couldn’t bear them to be out of reach. I learned from my last break from Facebook (which lasted a whole lonely day) what I need to be happy and stay in touch. Depression creeps in when I’m isolated and fills up all the spaces.

So now I turn my attention to finishing my assignments for the year, whilst getting my daily word count in for NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). 50,000 word draft of a novel plus assignments while stitching a Christmas present? No worries.

As always, do whatever it is that makes your days better. As my water bottle declares: Whatever Makes You Happy – just do that.

So I shall chase happiness and encourage you to do the same. Because life is so damn short. Just look at the lines upon your parents face, or the ones upon your own. Is there grey hair in your dog’s beard and have those kids shot up since last you noticed? Fast. Like a one step march through history. Remembered by some, until time catches up with them too. So fuck being remembered. Just be happy. In the long run no one even minds. They’ll watch you waltz delighted through your days and probably join in.

Be you, be happy.

Stay weird peeps.

Love Bon.

Stay You

Lately, I’ve realised that trying to be a grown-up has made me shrink again.  I’ve been thinking smaller, and my voice has quietened.  Which might be why I haven’t been here much. I’ve been aiming for an easier version of myself.  Easier for other’s to get along with anyway.  And I for one don’t think that’s actually what adulthood is all about.

I’m tired of being reasonable and responsible.  I’m tired of having to smile in grocery lines just to prove that peeps like me can be kind. I’ve exhausted myself, trying to keep my freak on a leash.  I am so sick of representing the nice side of weirdness.  It’s making me cranky.  I’m becoming intolerable – to myself. For once I wanna tap into my moody teen bitch and bring her forth to get people to back up off me for a bit.

So I think for a while I’m gonna get loud again.  I’m going to take up space and not apologise for it. I’m not going to smile on the days I don’t bloody feel like it.  I’m not going to waste any more of my time making other people feel ok about who I am.  Because no matter how ‘nice’ I dress, how much I cover up my tatts or god forbid, take my piercings out, I’m still me.  I’m still the awkward chick whose foot lives in her mouth.  Who laughs at the wrong time and sings off key. I’m tired of fighting my nature, just to be accepted by people I don’t even care about.  So the mum jeans are going to the op shop, the hats and scarves that cover up this head of mine are going in the bin. In fact, everything I’ve ever brought and keep for the days I have to look the part is all going.  Because I am the part.  I’m me, in all my weirdo wonderfullness.  So to the people who don’t want to be anywhere near it… please take yourself calmly to the nearest exit. It’s ok if you don’t like me, there’s no accounting for taste. But do shush on your way out, keep the hate inside and let it poison only you.

I’ve spent a long time making myself stronger, braver, truer. After all that work  I just can’t fit back into the box anymore.  So despite going back to uni, learning new skills and aiming for a whole new career… you can bet I’ll be showing up to job interviews as myself.  Who knows? The world might just be ready for me now.

I guess in a nutshell it comes down to that old saying: Always, always be yourself.  You may as well, becuase you’re not cut out to be anybody else.

Stay weird peeps,

X Bon

prove yourself

 

From my door to yours.

Some stuff I’ve been doing over the last couple of days. Happy moments, puppy photo’s, Autumn shots. Ok yeah, mostly photo’s. Maybe some wise words. Maybe some laughs. Light and fluffy this one!

Took Crowley with me to the kids training night. I’d had a rest day and didn’t walk her. So we went did a lap of the oval and worked on her puppy training. Officially working on voice commands in public, with distractions like cars, kids, dogs, bright lights etc. Honestly though? Her lovely nature keeps me sane and gives me an excuse to focus on her in a crowded place. Plus she only poops and pee’s at home. So that’s turned out to be a weird bonus in public!

Kisses for mumma.

A calmer moment after puppy training.

Past Bonnie ordered some merch from My Favorite Podcast and an email came through reminding me it’s on the way! Whoo hoo! Thanks past Bonnie! You’ve made current Bonnie excited and Future Bonnie will probably squeal at the postman!

Someone shared this meme in my book club group and I looooove it. Accurate, hilarious, on point. All the hallmarks of a good meme. You’re welcome.

Long time fan of Constance Hall. Not as far back as Big Brother, but further than her first book. I pre-ordered both and love them!

Thank god for Facebook! Made her viral, showed me blogging, taught me stuff about my inner queen. Vital! Honestly I love Con and her whole Queen Team. Mum life, wife life, living and loving and growing. Strength and pain. Turmoil, change and joy. It’s aaaaaall good.

I don’t crochet to sell anymore (I recently tried but my hands aren’t reliable enough with Fibro). But I still love making hats and writing my own notes/patterns. This one was for a kid I adore for her birthday. It’s was a rectangle (the fat ribbing part is the brim). When I sewed the rectangle closed and she stuck it on her head it turned into a ‘cat’ hat. She loved it!

Ok, honestly I made a pussy hat. Feminism sneaks in when we’re young from strong women (and men) around us. I think I’ll make a bigger one for myself!

Whoopie rocking the inspiration. And a kick arse tee.

I shared this one on my Facebook page and it snowballed into a joke and then a pact and now whoever dies first will be treated to my glorious husband streaking down the aisle at their funeral. I love it all the levels.

Imagine everyone seated respectfully in a funeral home. Some dressed in black, some in ridiculous clothes (ok, that one is me. I WILL wear rainbows to a funeral and you know it). The music stops, there’s a hush. Just as the minister person takes the stand, hubby runs down the aisle. Naked and screaming WE’RE GOING STREAKING! If it’s not my funeral I might leap up and join him. You are welcome for that image!

Gotta love Will Ferrell!

Today was a Sunday here in Oz and Autumn is beautiful in Australia. We took the back way to a family do this arvo because of roadworks. Hubby drove and I went nuts with my phone camera. Oh Australia, how I love you! Second Spring! Big skies, sunshine, paddocks, livestock, gumtrees. It does good things to my heart. Nothing to see here, just God putting the planet down for a three month nap. Winter is coming people!

I’m rugged up under a blanket on the couch now. It hit 22 degree’s (Celsius) during the day. Now it’s nearly midnight and it’s 8 degree’s. Feels like 5 and my fingertips are numb. Ahhhh perfect snuggling weather.

Those were all taken in the Pentland Hills, Victoria if you’re curious. Love where you live!

I’m nearly up to the second season of West World (no spoilers allowed! Please!).

I feel like I’m gonna need this meme after I’ve finished the second season!

Holy moly it’s a ride! I recommend it. Highly. And I don’t do that often. These are the shows it gives a nod to, with Anthony Hopkins reprising the same level of sinister language perfection from Silence of the Lambs. Jurassic World, Hunger Games, Black Mirror, Wild Wild West, Twilight Zone and more. You’ll love the soundtrack too, trust me. I’m 34, I watched it with an 18 year old and we both loved the music. Take a peek behind the curtain. Thank me later. Oh and don’t start with the 1975 version, go straight to the new one. I found the entire first two seasons on Foxtel. You can find it there or wherever you ‘find’ your content. Again, you are welcome!

So. That’s my life lately in a nutshell.

I’ll leave one more pic.

That was the view from my back porch this morning. But not too early this morning, it’s a Bloody Sunday after all! Ahhhh Autumn. The heart sings!

Stay weird peeps.

X Bon.

A golden age

Some of my friends have heard me say that I think we’re living in a golden age and make this half hearted smile like I’m being sarcastic. Fair call, more often then not I am sarcastic. But not this time.

Because we ARE living in a golden age. Right now if you’re reading this on a tablet or your phone can you just take a sec and go wow, yeah, that’s pretty cool. As a kid who grew up in the 90’s with no internet, phone, tablet or such it’s pretty fricken awesome. The best we had were Gameboys, Tazo’s, Tamagotchi’s and Rollerblades we’re still the hot new thing. We didn’t have phones and we went home when the streetlights came on. Trust me kids, you’re luckier than you think.

Also, this year Australia FINALLY voted yes to marriage equality, made it law and made me cry big fat happy tears. I was diagnosed with RA but because of the wonderful drugs we have now, my pain won’t be 24/7 like it could have been 10 years ago. Today I’m sitting on my couch, under the air con, watching whatever the heck I want on Netflix while scrolling through Facebook on my phone. Life is goooooood.

There’s no pitch here, no ironic message. As someone who often doesn’t have a lot of mobility I’m grateful. I can talk online to my friends, stay entertained and up to date with the world and I have no excuse to ever be bored. Pretty great huh?

Sometimes, all the little things in life that we see every day can add up to something pretty special. I’ve got a call coming in on my watch now, the one my Dad calls my Maxwell Smart gadget.

So TTFN my dears.

💋 Bon xx